Monthly Archives: February 2016

Dating Advice from Someone Who Doesn’t Know How to Date: How do I make him interested in me?

So last time, I discussed ways to tell if a guy is interested in you.  Now, we delve a little further: how can you make a guy interested in you?

If you can tell from the title of this category, I am no dating guru.  I am not going to sit here and pretend I know all the voodoo mind tricks you can use to hypnotize a dude into getting an erection when he looks at you.

Here is the thing: think about what makes you attracted to a guy.  Not only physically, but physically and personality-wise (i.e. the whole package.)  The truth is, it is hard to tell.  You actually don’t really have control over who you’re attracted to.  I was once attracted to a guy who played golf, is blond, and is a software engineer.  However, I could meet another guy with all of these characteristics and not be attracted to that guy.

Attraction is very complex.  It is also difficult to manipulate your attraction to people.  Sure, you can grow attracted to someone when you weren’t initially, but that is still largely out of your control.  Have you ever successfully forced yourself to be attracted to someone?  I know I haven’t.

So the question is, if you can’t manipulate your attraction to others, is there a way to manipulate someone else’s?

There are decent tips out there on how to make things work in your favor.  Showering, being positive, and not being an asshole are some of them.

However, in the end of the day, you don’t have that much control over what a guy thinks of you.  If you ever find yourself in a situation where you like the guy, but are not sure if he likes you back, remember that it is okay to like him even if the feeling is not mutual.

You are not obligated to win the approval of every guy you date.  You’re allowed to like guys even if they don’t like you back.  In the event that you do find yourself liking a guy, let him know!  Text him saying you had a great time, and be nice to him.  However, if he doesn’t reciprocate, don’t push it.  Just move on and continue being your charming self until the right one comes along.


Dating Advice from Someone Who Doesn’t Know How to Date: Is He Interested?

Hi all, I am a 24-year old cis female heterosexual vagabond, and for some reason, people tend to ask me for dating advice. I date semi-frequently and am still single, so I have no idea why they do. The only advice I think I am qualified to give is sex advice to guys. But I did have something to say about a popular question: How can you tell if a guy (or girl, for that matter) is interested?

The short answer to this question is, you can tell when he acts interested. And trust me, deep deep down, you already know if he is interested. Commence listicle!

1.) He talks to you.

He asks questions to you about you – your life, your career, your interests, etc.

Yes, there are shy guys out there who don’t ever speak to you, but secretly like you. They don’t matter as, in the end of the day, you can’t date someone you never interact with (although making the first move is always an option.)

If a guy never initiates interaction with you given multiple opportunities – including you initiating a few times – then, well, he probably does not care to interact with you that much.

Trust me, I learned this from experience.

2.) When he does interact with you, he seems happy about it.

He smiles, laughs, and genuinely seems to be enjoying your presence.  If he seems bored, in pain, or constipated every time you two have a conversation…not good sign.  Also, eye contact.

Exactly How To Know FOR SURE If A Guy Likes You

3.) Body language.

Behavioral psychologists are much more equipped to give advice on this, but if he is turned toward you and not away from you, that is great start.  If he doesn’t mind leaning in and being in close proximity to you – congratulations, you don’t smell.  Also, he doesn’t mind touching you.  If a guy voluntarily touches you affectionately, it is a clear sign he does not find you repulsive.  Of course, the extent to which he does this when you two are not yet dating needs to be appropriate, but the definition of that is up to you.

If you are still in the dark about this, I find this trick to work: When you two are hanging out and sitting in close enough proximity, “accidentally-on-purpose” rest your knee or ankle against his leg (DO THIS SUBTLY).  If he doesn’t automatically jerk away his leg, that is a good sign.

4.) Go with your gut.

I strongly believe that, like I said in the beginning, you will know deep down when you aren’t over-analyzing.  Do you notice if he treats you a little more special than everyone else, or is he just nice to you like he is to everyone else?  There is a difference!  Also, some guys do flirt deceptively, so watch closely.  Is he only flirting with you, or with you and your friends?  Then, he is flirting, but not because he particularly likes you (there is a reason this post is not titled “Signs He is Flirting…”

In conclusion, these signs indicate if he is interested in you, but it’s still hard to tell how much.  Is he only interested in you for a one night stand, marriage, or something in between?  No idea.  Time will tell the truth.  But until then, flirt away!

Also, check out this more competent advice article: